


a little bit lost, a little bit found

by lostin_space



Series: quick little doodles [81]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Communication, M/M, Substance Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:54:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22287469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostin_space/pseuds/lostin_space
Summary: “We don’t have to date, but can you just keep me ‘til I die?”
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Series: quick little doodles [81]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1441564
Comments: 18
Kudos: 98
Collections: Roswell New Mexico ▶ Michael Guerin / Alex Manes





	a little bit lost, a little bit found

“We don’t have to date, but can you just keep me ‘til I die?”

Alex sighed and looked down to where Michael was laying. Alex had been trying to enjoy his dinner-for-one when Michael waltzed in and basically collapsed on the floor. Buffy had sniffed him all over to make sure he was allowed to be here and then licked his face when she decided he was harmless. Now, he was eating dinner and listening to Michael talk that showed just how fucked up he was.

“What?” Alex asked. He really shouldn’t have, but he was curious.

“Like… Buffy. You’ll keep her 'til she dies. You’ll feed her and cuddle her and walk her and bathe her… I could be your dog too,” Michael said, voice not quite like his own. It had an otherworldly, childish air to it. Alex ripped off a piece of his roll and popped it into his mouth.

“I’m not bathing you or taking you on walks, Guerin,” Alex said. He didn’t even have it in him to sigh anymore. This was just his life now.

“No,” Michael whined, “I can do that.”

“I’m glad to hear it, but I don’t know if I believe you. I don’t think you’ve bathed in a while,” Alex pointed out. Michael had a layer of dirt on him that would be unsettling if it wasn’t normal. Or, perhaps it was still unsettling.

“I just… I want a forever and no one wants forever with me. People just… leave. No matter how hard I try, the second I think I’m safe, they leave,” Michael said. Alex peered down at him for a moment. Then he reached his foot out and rubbed it against Michael’s stomach like he would Buffy. It made him give a drunken smile and he grabbed onto Alex’s foot gently.

“Max and Isobel have never left you,” Alex insisted. That made his smile fall.

“Max said we aren’t friends or family and Isobel never argued,” Michael said. Alex furrowed his eyebrows. “He says we’re brothers sometimes, but… You ever think someone only wants you when it helps them?”

Alex licked his lips and sighed softly. He knew that feeling well and it wasn’t a pleasant one.

“Okay, I’ll keep you,” Alex said. Michael looked up to him, eyes wide and dilated. He clutched Alex’s foot like a lifeline. “One condition.”

“Yeah?” Michael whispered. Alex couldn’t help but smile.

“You have to keep me forever too, even if we’re not together. That’s the rule or no deal,” Alex said. Michael’s smile widened to a point where it was comical. His eyes fluttered closed as if he was too blissed out to keep them open.

“Okay,” he whispered. Alex shook his head.

“What did you take?” Alex asked, pressing his foot into his stomach again. Michael just shook his head. “You’re not even gonna remember this when you sober up.”

“I remember everything if you’re there,” Michael said, holding Alex’s foot to his heart. Alex sighed and nodded, spearing his green beans with his fork.

Michael was family, real family. He would keep him for as long as he loved him. Considering that love stayed regardless of years of separation, there seemed to be no end in sight. He wasn’t lying when he said he’d keep him.

He just hoped it would make Michael want to be sober again.

“If you say so.”

**Author's Note:**

> also on my tumblr: spaceskam


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